everyday with Joleen

Yesterday I was reading about Mike Guglielmucci, the singer, composer, the pastor who lied to the whole world that he actually dignose with cancer start from 2 years ago. He compose this very famous song ” Healer”, this song has touch many people. Until 2008 August, he confess that whole thing is a lie to cover up his hidden addiction.

I know about this long ago, but it does not effect me much until yesterday. I read his story in email, searching this song, finding related video in youtube. I really stunned and shock, it affected me emotionally. LOL

lets read abit from the email.

Christians around the world felt shocked and betrayed when the 29-year-old minister admitted he had faked cancer for two years in a strange ploy to hide his secret pornography addiction. The fiasco has become one of the biggest scandals to rock Australia’s Christian community in years.

In a tearful apology aired on Australian television several weeks ago, Guglielmucci said he faked symptoms and wrote bogus e-mails from doctors. He sat in waiting rooms alone while his family assumed he was getting treatment. He appeared in church concerts with an oxygen tube in his nose, deceiving thousands of mostly teenage fans into believing he needed a physical healing.

This talented but tormented young man eventually trapped himself in his own deceptive web.

Church leaders asked him to confess his lies to the police, since he used the story to raise funds. He was stripped of his ministerial credentials and is now receiving psychiatric help. Aussie church leaders, including pastor Brian Houston of Hillsong Church in Sydney, had to make public statements to calm distraught churchgoers who feel betrayed and, in some cases, defrauded of their money.

Healer

I listen to this song, felt the emotion is so strong. It seems like telling how much pain that he is going through.. I am sure when he wearing the oxygen tube and faking all the symstoms, he is in pain… He is in guilt yet he cannot help himself,

He sat in waiting rooms alone while his family assumed he was getting treatment. He appeared in church concerts with an oxygen tube in his nose,

imagine to cover up the lies & he needs to pay so much consequences. He needs to so lonely sitting in waiting rooms.. He needs to face so many audience and his fans when he wear that oxygen tube. Well, he has to wear it, i mean if not he might be disposed by that time .I Think at first he start with a small lies, at the moment

Guglielmucci admitted that he began to weave his false story of illness in order to mask his addiction. Sometimes he felt so guilty after looking at porn that he couldn’t go to work—so he called in sick. He dug himself deeper every day. His little lies grew to become a monstrous con job.

I not sure maybe he din aware how famous is he? How influential is he to the people? Or he know he is so famous and he has to keep telling lies to people. From his point of view, I understand the fear of rejection from the close one. People look up on him and he has to protect that image..Rite? he is a pastor, how can pastor addicted to pornography?

he is living 2 kind of lives, fake image.

He needs to go through suffering that no one can imagine, I believe when he sing this.. he mean it.

From audience point of view, or close ones. Is really hurtful to accept that, even he lies to his own family..

I heard his dad saying in the video

I have start planning my son’s funeral start from 2 years ago…

wow, I do not know what to say.

he has to revealed his lies anyhow coz tak kan.. he really wan to fake until really die and have funeral for himself?>.< he has to reveal it.

From another point of view, I think he is really courageous to admit his lies, I mean who really willing to confess it in front of so many ppl. Thousands & million people including those who has giving alot to him. He surely know that people will hate him.. He surely know the attention & benefit that gain from “fake cancer illness” will be gone. But he brave enough to do it..

Im keep asking myself, will i be willing to say sorry & conffess to so many ppl? It is so hard.

even saying sorry to one person is hard..

Anyhow, I accept him as who he is.

Just want to say this, I am affected by this also coz there are people who deceived and lies to me .. I been trying to keep all these as secret and act as nothing infront of these people. Praying & hoping one day you will tell the truth to me, praying that one day you will really take off your mask. Be true in front of God & accept who you are. I am just telling you, I accept you coz i know me myself too are sinners, we are just the same.

Also myself who make mistakes and affected others, i know in hidden me there is another “me” maybe myself do not recognise it. I wish that God will someday change me from inside out, I do not also want to carry guilt with me whenever i did wrong. I know the feeling of couldn’t help myself just like Mike Guglielmucci. But I believe Jesus can make impossible possible

this incident really makes me think alot.

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